I’ll be honest, I haven’t been in this industry for very long, comparatively. It’s been about ten years now, starting from my first paid gig (actual money for writing something that was paid to me by a supplement company). So while it’s been a short ride, there are people who have been around the industry seemingly forever…particularly in Florida where numerous major nutritional companies have their headquarters, and there are more than a few transplants from the Northeast…virtually all of whom have their own “Kneller story” to tell. But the weirdest is the rumor that he purchased the Scottish title of “Baron” so he could call himself Bruce Kneller, Baron of Kelly, when he and his wife went to China (or something). I shelved this information, having heard it in the past, but someone brought it up again, so I did some digging…and found the following:

Here’s a closer look at the important bits:

William Wallace is rolling in his grave.

..So basically what Baron von Douchenstein did, was pay some people some money, so he could call himself Bruce Kneller, Baron of Kelly (whicn is the title he purchased). He actually can’t call himself “Baron Bruce Kneller’ because that’s reserved for peerage titles (this one is a feudal title). Anyone who possesses a combination of  high  disposable income and cartoonish egopathy can purchase such a title. Although it should be noted that there are a lot of scam titles for sale out there – Kneller also got ripped off to the tune of five figures attempting to purchase an additional French title of nobility (or something).